read this if you want to regulate

You’re likely to hear the terms "regulation" and "co-regulation" frequently in therapy these days, especially with the nervous system becoming a major focus in the self-help arena—and I’m here for it.

In my approach as a therapist, I draw from Somatic Therapy, rooted in the Greek word soma, meaning "of the body." This method highlights the body’s role in processing emotions, accessing sensations and movements that often go beyond words. By focusing on physical awareness, you can better understand your nervous system's role in emotional regulation and co-regulation within relationships. Using a body-based approach offers a more integrated path to healing, helping you connect to yourself and others in a deeper, more meaningful way.

Regulation is like your system running properly, while dys-regulation is akin to your system crashing.

One of the ways you are able to move through the world without your inner computer crashing is learning to regulate your nervous system on your own. Self-regulation is a state, not a trait. You are not a regulated person 24/7. You are a dynamic human under the influence of other people places and things all the time. You are impacted by conscious and unconscious information, verbal and non-verbal communication constantly. Working somatically helps build awareness of when these state shifts happen, and how to choose your reactions to them.

Some of the quick interventions that work for me when suddenly dys-regulated are drawn from Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing, and Pat Ogdon’s Sensorimotor Therapy. The objective of SE and Sensorimotor skills are to acquaint you with your nervous system, and equip you with ways to anticipate, tolerate, and ride the physical and emotional waves of distress.

My go to “skills” are:

Other People Self regulation is hard to do on your own, so it’s okay to ask for co-regulation from a trusted person. Think of it as borrowing from a friend. Call them, Go hang out their couch, or some contact that helps you synchronize just enough to crowd out some of the overwhelm.

Movement including dancing, jumping, and throwing my body around in a safe location.

Singing and Humming for me, the vibration in my throat and body recalibrate me when I am feeling stuck. Peter Levine calls this “Vu”. As you use the depth of your voice and say “Vu”, something fills your system, sound, feeling, etc. It makes for a powerful shift when you are feeling overwhelmed and at your max by vibrating and expanding. It also works well when you are feeling empty and depressed by filling you up with the sound and the vibration to feel the nothingness being met with sound.

Music I mean, what better time to make a play list?

Deep Breathing, which for me was very difficult at first. I did not like the feeling of being in my body for many years. Taking a deep breath, doing box breathing, belly breathing, and just plain old paying attention to my breath took some getting used to- the more I was able to stay with it, I began to genuinely like my body and appreciate its functions.

Attunement for when I am feeling like drifting off into a dissociative state. Just like it sounds, I tune in, bringing my attention to my 5 senses. Noticing my environment, giving my brain a break from spinning.

I hope this was helpful. You might want to follow the computer analogy into my post for couples - which one of you is the mac and which one of you is the pc?